For this week I wrote about my weekend and it was like my grandma birthday yeah I hope you enjoy.
On the 9th of March I went to Auckland for my Grandma birthday party.Firstly I went to Silvia park with my Cousin and Sister to go shopping my sister bought a like over $200 dollar. I bought like a coin wallet and a my favorite drink which was A salty plum bubble pearl tea, I spent only like $20 dollar and my cousin spend as same my sister,so then went to the dinner party at Manukau we had lots of people like probably 100 or more people went to my grandma birthday party I finally so my old cousin I have seen in last year we like some traditional bag fish that I didn't like (I don´t know what is it called) Then I eat of the pineapple from the sweet and sour pork so then we got dessert which was Mochi I was silly I took advantage,how It was sticky and gluey and just sticky and slap in the to my cousin he tried to karate on me but and stick on and run down the restaurant so then I quickly went to my dad car and hide in there so he saw went in the car so,he open the back of the van so he saw so I rushed somewhere that was dark and
hard to see which was the grass so that was that and he saw then and ran back and punch and run yeah and he was slow like a snail that why he couldn't catch me and then we play my other cousin and play on the skateboard my sister was super scared on the tiny skateboard. My dad van could only fit 6 people in the minimum and there was 7 people there like one them were fat one of them are few of them were normal sized and me and my sister were at the back and it was to squash I didnt like it my sister didn't like it and yeah so we had go back in the Sky-city I had a spa pool which was the relax and I nearly sleep on the spa it was that relaxing and that was a day. ITS FINALLY FINISH
Wow, that sounds like a fantastic way to celebrate your Grandma's birthday. I am very curious about your favourite drink - A salty plum bubble pearl tea, I have never heard of it before. Maybe next time you could try to add some more descriptive language. Talk about what you see, feel, hear, smell, taste to give the reader more information.
ReplyDeleteI see you have been adding to your story each week, maybe if you do this, you could miss a line each time you add so we can clearly see the new parts you add.
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